Idiot neighbors abound

Clearing up some misconceptions on my part: the puppy turned out to be a) female and b) barking all the time because she was tied on a four-foot leash and largely ignored. I made friends with her by petting her. She seemed starved for attention, and I had a new friend.

Until two Saturdays ago.

I got up early and started mowing the lawn, and as I did I made two unpleasant discoveries. First, the neighbors' idea of what to do with the puppy on a 90-degree day was to tie her to the side steps, on the aforementioned way-too-short leash. They did give her food and water, thank goodness, but once the sun moved overhead, she wasn't in the shade anymore and couldn't get to shade. She just lay sadly on the porch, panting.

The second discovery was that their defenseless-animal-acquiring spree hadn't ended with the puppy -- they also got a kitten. You can imagine my joy.

Around 11 a.m. I watered my new azaleas, and offered the puppy a drink from the hose -- she shrank back in terror as though she thought I would hit her with it. I'll take Very Bad Signs for $200, Alex.

Around 1 p.m. I decided I would call the Humane Society if the puppy was still outside. I looked out to confirm that she was (and she was), and as I watched, one of the kids opened the door and the kitten made a break for it, probably realizing its life was heading downhill fast. The kid chased the kitten, grabbed it by the neck -- not the scruff of the neck, but underneath, in a choke hold, and threw it into the house. The poor cat flew about seven feet.

I was on the phone within seconds.

A few minutes after that I went to get something out of my car, and the other kid was preparing to walk the puppy on the four-foot leash. I'm no dog expert, but even I know that's not going to work. The puppy lit up when she saw me, and lunged for me, tail wagging. It broke my heart to walk back into my house and leave her there.

And that was the last time I saw her, or the kitten. I called a few days ago for an update and they told me the neighbors had surrendered both animals.

I was surprised -- that seems a bit drastic -- but apparently, faced with the choice of caring for the animals or giving them up, they chose to give them up.

The whole episode really pisses me off. Why get the animals in the first place? Animal control officer has got to be one of the most frustrating jobs there is. People adopt animals for stupid reasons, they refuse to take basic care of them, and they give them up for stupid reasons.

The scary thing is, a lot of those people also have kids.

Speaking of people who shouldn't have kids, Stacy has started a brilliant project to chronicle the misadventures of her neighbor, who recently (and frighteningly) became a father. Check out http://idiotneighbor.blogspot.com, which is way more fun than this post.